The ABC's of Inclusive Language: K is for Karen
An image of Amy Cooper from the viral video taken by Christian Cooper
Ebony was worried about her report Molly’s performance, so she set up a meeting. During the meeting, Ebony gently laid out the issues, including not showing up for meetings, late assignments, and easily avoided mistakes. She made recommendations and told Molly that if the issues weren’t resolved, she would be put on a Performance Improvement Plan.
A week later, Ebony was called into her VP’s office. She was surprised to be confronted by an angry and tearful Molly. Molly repeated her claims, crying the whole while. Ebony was aggressive! Ebony had attacked her! Working for Ebony made her feel unsafe!
Molly was being a “Karen.”
___
Like many of our slang words in American English, “Karen” emerged from Black communities.
It's a shorthand label for a white woman who behaves in ways that threaten the safety and well-being of Black people.
👱♀️ “You know this line is for the first-class passengers, right?”
👱♀️ “I’m not going to show you this Hermes bag. You can’t afford bags like this.”
👱♀️ “I’m sorry, but I don’t believe this check you’re trying to cash is actually yours. There’s no way you’re an architect.”
Acting like a Karen means gatekeeping (specifically, keeping people out of “white” or “fancy” spaces).
Acting like a Karen means claiming you were the victim of aggression when in fact *you* were the one being aggressive.
Acting like a Karen often means crying and presenting yourself as a specimen of fragile white womanhood who deserves and requires protection.
___
“White women’s tears” often do result in white men leaping into action. Unfortunately, when accusations are unfounded, leaping into action usually means that innocent people are harmed.
It’s been pointed out that there is a sexist component to the use of Karen, and that there isn’t really a male equivalent. And while this is true, there is also a specifically female and feminine aspect to much Karen behavior. Especially tears and claims of feeling unsafe and attacked.
These tears and claims are DARVO tactics, which I describe in “J is for Just Joking.” They are used to Deny the harm they have done, Argue with the facts, and Reverse the Victim and Offender.
And these tactics have been used for centuries. Just yesterday, I was talking with a client about how to deal with a problematic high-ranking white woman in his organization. “Protect yourself,” I told him. “Don’t get yourself Emmett Till’ed.” And we both shook our heads.
___
As it turns out, Ebony’s VP had known her for years, and believed her version of things. But for many, many people like Ebony, it is Molly’s version that is seen as credible and believed.
In the workplace, saying Karen things like, “I felt unsafe,” can end careers.
And out there in the world, saying Karen things like, “I felt unsafe,” can end lives.
And that’s not inclusive language.
Inclusive language proficiency is essential for professional and organizational success. Worthwhile's strategic and inclusive language services increase engagement, productivity, and profitability.
Copyright 2021 © Worthwhile Research & Consulting.